November Resolutions

Hell yeah, why not. I won’t have enough time in December, anyway … Let’s have some November resolutions instead, while we still can. Don’t hate me for being the fastest, I usually am and it was usually a bad decision.

My resolutions till next November are:

– I want to lose my brand new, old age dyslexia. Either that or take up a new job. Something with large scale decoration. Or cleaning of all those fancy but not really appreciated open space offices.

– I want to further exploit my talent for vegan food. Cheese is generally kaka, though milk and eggs are not.

– Sport, sport, sport, sport, sport, sport … need I say more? OK, here we go: sport, sport, sport. Loving it.

– Till next November I need to decide whether to stop pulling out my hair. I mean: grey hair. That’s the way I have been doing small scale old age dy(e)ing so far.

– I need to … hm, do I? … Maybe not yet. (yes it’s about- OK, next year)

– So where have all the flowers gone? … Ach ja, resolution: I am going to wear real colours, as much as I can. And skirts and dresses. All 5 of them!

– I am going to try a 6-month shopping break again and after that, I am going to check with Greenpeace who’s using the least chemicals. Nothing against chemistry (or math, for that matter) but I don’t want to support the killing us softly attitude. And no, ha und em is not the worst one this year.

– Waiting for me to say something about mathematics, aren’t you?!?! Caught ya! Well, ladies and gentlemen, I am going to do maths. As much as I can – which is not a lot, unfortunately. But the good news is: I am soon going to be able to tell you my age without counting ze fingers!

– Apocalypse? Not now, bitches.

– Yes, I know I should work less, I don’t have conversation, do I, really. I still want to be able to decide freely, so EU economy, don’t force the decision upon me, this is not a dictatorship.

– I am going to continue reading my carefully chosen French books. There’s no way to avoid it und das ist auch gut so.

– I need to learn how to bake other kinds of bread – love the idea already!

– I am becoming too old for too much self-depiction and verbal self-decoration to sell the product. That’s right: IF A = my chronological age AND B = my mental age THEN: A – B < 0 AND A/B < 1. Last time I checked, this was called “adult”, not “abnormal”.

– This year I seriously thought about us emigrating. To a warm country with lots of paddle-able water. And veggies (as in: absolutely no sausage stench, nowhere). And large open space offices in need of cleaning.

– Contact lenses rule.

– Kindle rules.

– Sport rules.

– Colours rule.

(November is kaka)


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