Category Archives: SPORTSFREUND

Sleepless In Denmark

“Remember having asked me about possible reasons for not doing this anymore?” he says suddenly, unexpectedly. “This would be one. But we can avoid that in the future.”

He is right, of course: while we have started our paddling tour in Denmark before the school holidays begin, we should still have expected larger campsites to attract youngsters of a certain kind at any time. Certain kind means being able to tow unbelievable quantities of beer crates to the campsite and at the same time unable to get very far by paddling on the river, which is where the cars come in, at some later point.

And did I mention the Soccer World Cup was to start soon?

Anyway, we did not get much sleep in our tent that night, but I chose not to grow the huge bags under my eyes without a fight. I shared my personal opinion about the partying youngsters with my restless husband and didn’t spare him any details: I was quite sure the Danes understood enough German to know what my problem was. They did. And were soon making fun of my “Scheiße!”. Which was when the i-word was used. But before things got any worse, the idiots stopped singing, yelling and talking and went to sleep, leaving us to try to do the same.

At that point, we had done quite some paddling and really needed some rest, and I would have preferred to end the day by going through the lovely pictures of the magnificent Gudenå in my head, but river fans cannot be choosers, so.

Our tour had started in Skanderborg, a day later than planned because the wind was trying so hard to blow away the gravity of the water, as it often does. What else to do but to go shopping instead: Aarhus offered its facilities and we said thank you, though we almost ended up buying nothing. That is: I bought 2 outdoor jackets for next to nothing and left them in the car for the rest of the paddling tour, because I wasn’t concentrating properly.

The next day we could finally cross the peaceful lake Mossø – it had apparently lost all the will to try to kill us that was on such a magnificent display the day before. I felt victorious, for no reason at all, and we entered the Gudenå system.

In this system of lakes, connected by the river Gudenå we spent another five days, which were even better than we had expected them to be, though our last long ride was full of rain, cold clouds, damp cows on moisty pastures and – singing, yelling and talking Danish youngsters at our destination. They had moved to our last campsite by cars and joined another group or two. That evening, Denmark won the soccer match against Peru. And we slept like two logs.

“We shall return,” he says a few days after the tour. “We will pack some ear plugs and avoid the high season and campsites in bigger places, but we will return. The river is magnificent.”

It is.



“Römische Dekadenz, wie?”

“Ja, warum nicht. Ich kann mich nicht mehr erinnern, wann ich zuletzt schwimmen war.”

Dabei mag ich Schwimmbäder.

Na gut, das heute war kein Schwimmbad, sondern eine waschechte Therme. Mit Heilwasser. Schön war es trotzdem.

“Mal sehen, ob wir nicht die jüngsten sind.” sagt mein besorgter junger Mann.

Sind wir nicht, auch nicht die ältesten. Die Besucher geben sich überhaupt nicht für Klugscheißerstatistiken her und das ist auch gut so.
Nun ja: Außer uns. Wir sind die einzigen ohne Badelatschen und Bademäntel. Totale Anfänger halt. Dafür sind meine Zehennägel perfekt lackiert, seit dem letzten Schwimmbadaufenthalt habe ich mich halt geändert. Ich glaube aber, dass das völlig umsonst war und allen egal ist. Die Welt interessiert sich heute nämlich gar nicht für mich.

Wie geil ist das denn.

Also schwimmen, von vielen Wasserstrudeln massieren lassen und abhängen, vom Außenschwimmbeckenrandlauf. Auf Liegestühlen eindösen, das Schwimmbeckenprogramm wiederholen, es sind ihrer drei. Schwimmbecken. Und überhaupt nicht überlaufen, die müden Weihnachtsshopper kommen wohl später.


Irgendwann werfe ich meine Bikinihose in den Müll, sie ist zu groß und rutscht zu schnell runter. Zum Glück hatte ich die Reserve dabei.

Ein wenig später bereuen wir die zu Hause hängenden Bademäntel noch mehr: Damit könnten wir ins Bistro nebenan. Wir haben Hunger. Also nochmals die 3 Schwimmbecken, raus, dann Dusche, Fön, Restaurant. Salat. Die Zwiebelringe lasse ich liegen und klaue Pommes bei meinem Schatz, um das Essig aus der Bahn zu werfen. Dann Kaffee.

Zu Hause fische ich meine letzte Einsendearbeit aus dem Briefkasten. Also schon korrigiert.

“Willst du nicht reinschauen?”

“Nö. Nach den Feiertagen. Heute habe ich keine Lust auf Überheblichkeit. Schon gar nicht auf unleserliche.”

Weil das ja klar ist. Als Kaufkraft ist man geschätzt, auch frau, sogar ausländisch. Sobald man aber irgendwas in Anspruch nimmt, wenn auch berechtigterweise, ist das mit der Schätzung so eine Sache. Und bei einer Ausländerin? Ist halt so eine Sache. Man soll ja heutzutage bekanntlich dankbar sein, in Deutschland leben zu können, und gar nicht so tun.

Dabei ist die Zahl der Einheimischen, die davon ausgehen, dass ich automatisch über sie herziehe, riesig. Zu groß. “Du hast ein Blog? Kannst dich dann in deiner Muttersprache so richtig auslassen, wie?”

Nö. Ich hab’s nicht so mit Zwangslästern. Lästerzwang. Ich lese halt Bücher und beobachte Menschen. Konzentriere mich auf das Wesentliche im Allgemeinen. Die Nationalität ist mir dabei schnuppe. Sorry. 


Glaskogen: Lessons In Love.

“I don’t think I can do that.”

It took me whole 60 seconds to find that out and say it. In my head, exclusively, I do have some pride. Now what? Wisely, I excluded the confession act as a possibility and gave it another try instead. And another one. I still couldn’t do it, but I walked on. Nothing else to do: I had claimed a few weeks ago, loudly and comprehensively, that I should be able to do it, so now it was too late to find out I couldn’t. So I walked on. Just like I’d do in real life, nothing new there for me.

Just before we started packing our rucksacks for a 3-day hiking tour, the rain had decided now was the time to act out the attention whore part and stick to it for some time. Of course it would, this is Sweden, for ticks’ sake! I could only hope my brand new Dalsland tan wouldn’t get rinsed off or mouldy till we get home. Home. Where the bed is. And the shower. Walk on.

Gradually, my body stopped hating me for carrying such a huge load for so long in such a rain and we made 8 kilometers that day. At the end of which, we discovered our first palace: they hadn’t bothered with the red carpet but painted the whole house red instead and inside, there were beds. And an oven. That day, I may or may not have believed in heaven on Earth …

Oh, the rain? It was our devoted companion all along. Jep. One of the most beautiful hiking areas there ever was, admired as water color. With the exception of a few moments, that is. Beautiful moments.

We spent the next night in another red house saying “Germans go home” on one of its walls. Sorry to say we didn’t. We couldn’t. Not after 15 kilometers in the rain and half a ton on our backs. But thank you for the oven and all the wood.

– – –

“Where did you spend your holiday, if I may ask?” The repairman was nice and talkative, so I told him the truth: “In Sweden.” The tremor rattling his body could be seen: “Sweden? Isn’t it … cold and rainy up there?” He checked my chocolate tan again – it must have provoked his question in the first place – and decided to stick to his opinion: “And grey?”

“Yes, it is,” I lied (not wanting all the world and her wife to travel there next summer), “but then, at least there are no mosquitos when the weather’s bad. And it is still very beautiful, Sweden is.”

That’s true. While I was afraid I’d be missing Finland way too much, I found Glaskogen area to be quite similar to our beloved Finnish hiking grounds and that was enough. Oh, and: we had enough sun in Dalsland to enjoy a 5-day paddling tour in the first place.

Strange, though … this year no one exclaimed Spain’s gonna win as soon as they heard us talking German. At least I thought that was strange until I finally had a look at a comprehensible Swedish newspaper: it contained the words Spain, Chile and fiasco. I couldn’t believe it.

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I lost my heart in Dalsland. Again.


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A Quickie, if there ever was one

I don’t know: maybe some of you will remember the boat hull we had ordered back in April, because we wanted to go kayaking and not canoeing this summer?

Well, it arrived today. I’d love to spread some more irony about the timing and the speed of work in Poland, the problem is: it is simply magnificent. 😀

Beautiful, practical, looks robust and everything.

So, obviously, we need to go paddling next weekend, if only to find out whether the new hull will fit the old wooden construction. Common, Sun, it’s your turn to … turn it up a bit, too.

Fast Thinking

“Actually …”

(This very important moment happened, like, 3 weeks ago)

“Actually, there couldn’t be a better starting point for us than the town we live in. We have Schwarzwald at our doorstep, Pfälzer Wald is more or less across the bridge and the Vosges are not that far either.”

“You’re right, of course! Why … So why haven’t we realized that before?”

“I guess we are simply too intelligent for such clever realisations.”

“And now we have embarras de richesses, don’t we.”

In the evening, I imagine hiking in Le Grand Canyon

In der Pfalz

“Ich habe einen Wanderweg entdeckt, der viel versprechend klingt. Ein so genannter Felsenweg. 17,5 Kilometer lang. In der Pfalz.”

In der Pfalz! Das ist immer eine gute Idee, das weiß ich inzwischen.

Die meisten Menschen, die wir auf dem Weg treffen, wirken auch so glücklich.

Den Lille Elgfrue.

Well, Madam Moose, what’s going on? Been little on the brittle side these few months, have we?

Erm … 😯 Yeah. Don’t know why, really.

Announcing publicly we were going to have fun this year, before we hit 40, didn’t we? Because life’s never been better than that, is it?

Well, yes. And I meant it. It is true. However … It still feels like … walking on broken glass. 😳

And all those stupid questions you’ve been asking yourself. Despite knowing the answers perfectly well for ages. AGES and you know that.

Well … It’s … Damn. Damn you.

Well, at least you stick to your workout routine. That’s good.

Thank you!?! Now, I … Murmuring to herself: How now brown cow, how now brown cow, how-

Yes, yes, yes! Go and buy it! Because you’re worth it. Just do it.

Kleingeschwätzeltes am Freitag / Petkove čvečkarije

Manchmal, beim Training, stelle ich mir vor, wie ich Karaoke singe.

Nein, natürlich kann ich nicht singen. 😯

Aber woran soll man schon beim Auf-dem-Crosstrainer-Hampeln denken, wenn man gerade “Verdammt ich lieb’ dich” hört?

Um schneller zu sein, versteht sich. 🙂

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